With my godfather now 87 and mother in ill health, :| my thoughts have been about planning for the inescapable, impermanence, death.

Being that I am a nominal Unitarian Universalist, I own these two books:

1. Great Occasions
Readings for the Celebration of Birth, Coming-of-Age, Marriage, and Death

What are the great occasions in human life? Birth, maturity, marriage, and death: These are the four corners of human life. These are the crystallizing events, the distinguishable days, the great occasions. Carl Seaburg has brought together over 650 pieces of writing to commemorate these moments. Poetry and prose, the work of writers as diverse as Aiken, Pound, Dickinson, Seneca, Blake, Buddha, Brontė, Marcuse, Stevens, Sexton, Tagore, Lippman, Sandburg, Sarton, Pasternak, Lao Tzu, Yevtushenko, and Yeats-the rich expression of human appreciation and celebration of our own great occasions.
and

2. In Memoriam

A Guide to Modern Funeral and Memorial Services
Second Edition

Based on years of experience in the ministry, Searl offers sensitive, practical advice for one of life's most difficult ceremonial passages. This updated and expanded version includes new material on writing obituaries, alternative settings, the rural cemetery movement, interment of ashes, cremation and selecting monuments and memorials. In Memoriam also offers information on writing a eulogy, traditional and non-traditional memorial customs, grieving, creating unique and memorable services on a budget, and more. Features eleven sample services to be used as they are or adapted.
Nishijima is quoted as saying that the Soto-shu is "guild of funeral directors." And there is much talk about impermanence in Soto Zen circles. But. I googled and youtubed (new verbs?), there is really not much that I found in the way of..."ok...you are Buddhist ...and you want to do your own funeral services, here is A, B, C..".

So. What are some funeral services one could do for a loved one? :?: