Stephanie posted something on another thread that has me thinking:

This is the difficulty, and one of my reservations, about an Internet sangha, that it is easy to be casual, half-engaged about it. One might drop in every once in a while to post a comment, or one might be a persistent presence but not be engaged on any real or personal level.
How committed am I to my practice? I read the forum daily, I listen to podcasts and watch Jundo's and Taigu's talks on occasion, I sit 4 or 5 nights a week. I don't do metta, or chant. I haven't been doing the zazenkais. I did the jukai ceremony, but rarely if ever wear my rakusa. How is commitment to be judged? Why do I feel unwilling to commit to sewing the okesa? Is this all just my search for "answers" like Stepanie also posted about? I seem to be at an interesting juncture in my practice.

I am glad you came back Stephanie.

Ron