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Thread: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

  1. #1

    Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    These words posted by Jinho ...

    What one gets at Treeleaf ... is also a mutual tremendous caring and support which is absent at many sanghas.
    ... and her being away for several weeks due to losing her computer, brought up something I have thought about for awhile.

    From time to time, one of us may be in hospital, have a personal emergency (or move on from this life). The rest of us would have little way to know. So, please consider leaving instructions with a close loved one who might, when they have a moment and things settle, let us know.

    Many of us would want to send our love and support, a kind word ... flowers!

    ... and, if suitable, perhaps add a thought for you to our weekly dedication for health and peace, or in our recital of Metta.

    These events of life are just what they are, coming and going, no place to go ... but it's nice to have people to care when we're not here.

    Gassho, Jundo

    ______________________________________________

    PS - Oh, and if anyone has a friend or close family member whose name or memory they would like to request to be added to our weekly dedication or Metta by the whole community ... just write or post, and I or others in the Sangha would be happy to do so.

    PPS- JohnH also made a very good suggestion ...

    Some kind of "buddy" system could work. If members know each other well enough, they could swap contact details. You could start a thread that lists members and their buddy, for example: Chet and Stephanie. If one "goes missing" you can contact the other.
    Please feel free to do that here or, when looking for someone, always feel free to start a new thread such as "Hey, has anyone seen Jack? Please PM me if in touch with him"
    Last edited by Jundo; 01-23-2015 at 06:07 AM.

  2. #2
    disastermouse
    Guest

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    What an awesome idea!

    Of course, we could just leave that info with you too, if we feel the teacher bond is close enough. Personally, I would have no problem leaving you my address, phone, and my mom's address (from where I could always be located).

    Chet

  3. #3
    Treeleaf Unsui Shugen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Redding California USA

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Good Idea! I'm all for it.

    Ron

  4. #4

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Quote Originally Posted by disastermouse
    What an awesome idea!

    Of course, we could just leave that info with you too, if we feel the teacher bond is close enough. Personally, I would have no problem leaving you my address, phone, and my mom's address (from where I could always be located).

    Chet
    Yes, that is fine too. But sometimes, none of us may realize that someone is absent (for being in hospital or such) for many weeks, even until after their return.

    Remember, around here, it is common for folks to take a time to go off on their own (you have, from time to time, Chet) ... and we do not disturb that. Or, folks simply leave ... and we do not chase after people who wish to try a different way. It is hard to tell the difference between that and someone's being ill or in transition.

    So, an "emergency alert" system by a family member has some benefits and such.

    Gassho, J

  5. #5

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Quote Originally Posted by Jundo
    Remember, around here, it is common for folks to take a time to go off on their own (you have, from time to time, Chet) ... and we do not disturb that. Or, folks simply leave ... and we do not chase after people who wish to try a different way.
    Please help me with this one. Often people do not want to be bothered if you don't hear from them in a while, but in my experience, if you don't know they don't want to hear from you, most of the time they appreciate care being offered if you can do it in a way that is free of any of your own agendas, such as working out your own past guilt. That's what I've come to believe anyway. No?

    Thanks ... Scott

  6. #6

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Very good idea!!

    I have this same arrangement with a very good friend of my in WV, And as you have suggested here, Jundo, we also have an agreement for someone close to us to let the other know whats up if we cannot.

    As for bothering each other.. well we have an agreement, as he is a gaming buddy and dear friend( He helped me with my PTSD a ton, as 1st gulf war vet he knew all too well of that stuff the mind deals ya). Anywho we check in every so often if one of us in MIA so to speak. A private message on our gaming board, failing that a quick text message or a phone call. Yeah there are times when were off wrapped up in life and in context here i think it would just make sense to have a little poke to make sure were okay. That said, for folks wishing for some time away and not wanting to participate they could simple change there location in their profile to Away or the like - perhaps consider it kinda like compassion for those who care.

    Gassho, Shohei

  7. #7

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Quote Originally Posted by scott
    Quote Originally Posted by Jundo
    Remember, around here, it is common for folks to take a time to go off on their own (you have, from time to time, Chet) ... and we do not disturb that. Or, folks simply leave ... and we do not chase after people who wish to try a different way.
    Please help me with this one. Often people do not want to be bothered if you don't hear from them in a while, but in my experience, if you don't know they don't want to hear from you, most of the time they appreciate care being offered if you can do it in a way that is free of any of your own agendas, such as working out your own past guilt. That's what I've come to believe anyway. No?

    Thanks ... Scott
    Yes, sometimes I drop a short "have not heard from you for awhile, thinking of you, how are you?" if I have not heard from someone in the Sangha for a long while ... But it is our traditional way in Zen not to press too much, not to chase after someone (nor to chase anyone in the door).

    For example, we have some regulars in the Sangha taking a little journey right now, needing a little space. It is an old tradition of monks who would wander in and out of the monastery, and take to the hills, at various seasons and times in their lives. It is part of the Practice, in fact.

    Gassho, J

  8. #8
    disastermouse
    Guest

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Quote Originally Posted by Jundo
    Quote Originally Posted by disastermouse
    What an awesome idea!

    Of course, we could just leave that info with you too, if we feel the teacher bond is close enough. Personally, I would have no problem leaving you my address, phone, and my mom's address (from where I could always be located).

    Chet
    Yes, that is fine too. But sometimes, none of us may realize that someone is absent (for being in hospital or such) for many weeks, even until after their return.

    Remember, around here, it is common for folks to take a time to go off on their own (you have, from time to time, Chet) ... and we do not disturb that. Or, folks simply leave ... and we do not chase after people who wish to try a different way. It is hard to tell the difference between that and someone's being ill or in transition.

    So, an "emergency alert" system by a family member has some benefits and such.

    Gassho, J
    I'm not sure if my family is reliable enough or tech-savvy enough to entrust with this - oddly. It's not that they don't care, it's just that they most certainly are not in the loop enough to know that I'm a frequent contributor to an 'online Sangha'. First, I'd have to explain for the umpteenth time what a 'Sangha' is (Me: 'It's like a church, Mom' Mom: 'Buddhist's go to church?' Me: 'No, Mom - it's an online website that functions as a Sangha which is sorta-but-not-really like the Buddhist equivalent of a Church.' Mom: 'How can you have a Church on the internet? You know, I just use email and play solitare on that thing' Me: '*sigh*').

    I may be able to entrust my little sister with the task... But she's unlikely to know the ins and outs of my life either. Actually, you all here are just as, if not more likely to know the context of my life as my family. Come to think of it, maybe that needs to be remedied.

    I think now that Stephanie is back, I could entrust her with the task...

    Chet

  9. #9

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    This is a great idea Jundo!

    I think my wife would be tech savvy enough to figure out how to get in touch with you if something happened to me, but making a point to have a discussion with her about it is well taken advice.

    I encourage everyone to do the same for the more dire emergencies. As for trying to get in touch with people we just haven't heard from in awhile, I'm not as sure how that would be accomplished without possibly treading on some "down time".

    I'm just glad this sort of thing gets discussed here.

    Gassho,
    Dosho

  10. #10

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Quote Originally Posted by disastermouse
    ...
    I think now that Stephanie is back, I could entrust her with the task...
    ...
    Chet
    Hi,

    Some kind of "buddy" system could work. If members know each other well enough, they could swap contact details. You could start a thread that lists members and their buddy, for example: Chet and Stephanie. If one "goes missing" you can contact the other.

    JohnH

  11. #11

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Quote Originally Posted by jrh001
    Quote Originally Posted by disastermouse
    ...
    I think now that Stephanie is back, I could entrust her with the task...
    ...
    Chet
    Hi,

    Some kind of "buddy" system could work. If members know each other well enough, they could swap contact details. You could start a thread that lists members and their buddy, for example: Chet and Stephanie. If one "goes missing" you can contact the other.

    JohnH
    This is a very good suggestion, and I will add it to the main post above.

  12. #12

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Hello all,

    I also think this is a great suggestion! Not too long ago, I had asked my husband, "If I die suddenly, would you please let my Sangha know?" Of course he first laughed at me then said 'yes'. He know where and how to find you all...

    But I do like the buddy system idea too.

    Gassho,
    Kelly (Jinmei)

  13. #13

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    As one that lives over 2000 miles from family that no doubt will not post anything about me here. The buddy system sounds like a very good idea to me as I have had some interesting diagnoses lately and one never knows what will happen.

    I do not fear death but I'd rather not leave others wondering what became of me. Trust that while there is breath in this body.. I will find WIFI! :wink:

    ~Gassho~

    LindaW

  14. #14

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Great idea!
    i love it!
    i will talk to my girlfriend and ask her to do just that in case of emergency.

    Gassho, Dojin.

  15. #15
    Rabbit
    Guest

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    I think the whole idea of this, is in fact an excellent practice to have, I know that I shall talk to my wife about it and make sure that she can get ahold of the sangha to let yas know, if something comes up...but I also really like the idea of the buddy system as well. The reason for this is, sometimes we are in realtionships or situations where one person may follow this path, while their partner, parent, friend or whoever has been asked may be of another way and not understand why we have made the request and why it would be important to us. So by having the buddy system as well as this, we can be sure that there is someone that can reach us and to get in contact with the sangha and inform everyone of the situation as to whaat is going on with us...thus leaving us with a clear mind for zazen.

    A fantastic idea.

    Gassho,
    Rabbit

  16. #16

    Re: Suggested Caring Alert System ...

    Great idea! Everyone should serriously consider doing this!! I know exactly who I'm going to team up with here(my former Ango partner.....if he is willing :wink: ) and I'll leave detailed instructions with my wife as well.

    Gassho,
    Hoyu

  17. #17
    yes jundo thats great!

    gassho
    gilles

  18. #18
    I have tried to impress upon my husband the importance of informing you all of any "emergency situation" but I'm afraid all that will go out the window if anything did happen to me - which, of course, he refuses to entertain the possibility! He has your email addy, Jundo, and my username on here, so one can hope he'll think to contact you at some point, if anything happens.

    Gassho,

    Lisa

  19. #19
    This is a fantastic idea, and the idea of ango partners being thier alert buddy is really clever (for those whom it would apply).
    --Washu
    和 Harmony
    秀 Excellence

    "Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body" George Carlin Roshi

  20. #20
    _/|\_ Gassho with deeply respect
    慈 ji 氣 ki : Energy of Compassion

  21. #21

    Emergency Offsite Contacts

    Hi all

    This arose from something Ishin said on another thread but I thought it needed its own thread rather than be posted there. Perhaps this has already been dealt with as an issue?

    It occurred to me that if something happened to me and I was unable to use a computer, no one here would have any clue where I went or that I was in any way in trouble. Even my wife probably wouldn't know how to inform anyone. Wouldn't it be a good idea for us to be able to at least call people or something if they suddenly are gone?
    The same thing has occurred to me on more than one occassion, and after Bobby's recent post it has become even more apparent that is needed.

    On a voluntary basis there should maybe be:
    1. a list of people to contact should we not hear from a Treeleaf person for a certain period of time (firstly, probably by contacting the member themself on an off-site email, secondly through the email or telephone of a loved one of the member).
    2. someone close to us who knows to contact Treeleaf to let them know if we have an accident, are in hospital or (in the worst case scenario) die unexpectedly. Other sanghas I have been part of could also be instructed to hold the appropriate ceremony for a deceased member of the community (to be held in addition to rather than instead of a family funeral). I don't know if that is the case here and if Jundo would want to lead a sangha ceremony in this way.

    Anyway, just thoughts and I can't imagine this hasn't already been thought about.

    Gassho
    Kokuu
    #sattoday

  22. #22
    Kokuu,

    We do have such a system, but it only works if people do it:

    http://www.treeleaf.org/forums/showt...g-Alert-System

    Gassho,
    Dosho

    Sat today

  23. #23
    Thanks, Dosho.

    I figured this would have been discussed before.

    I will set it in place.

    Gassho
    Kokuu
    #sattoday

  24. #24
    Nindo
    Guest
    Bumping up this thread due to recent discussion.

    Gassho,
    Nindo
    sattoday

  25. #25
    Hi Nindo,


    I was fortunate to have an address in the recent case. However, recent events have led to a discussion of rejuvenating our system here. Details soon.

    Gassho, J
    ALL OF LIFE IS OUR TEMPLE

  26. #26
    There has been some discussion of this today, Kokuu, and I will have some details soon of a system upgrade. Please stand by.

    I am going to merge this thread to the other for now.

    Gassho, Jundo
    ALL OF LIFE IS OUR TEMPLE

  27. #27
    Quote Originally Posted by Dosho View Post
    Kokuu,

    We do have such a system, but it only works if people do it:

    http://www.treeleaf.org/forums/showt...g-Alert-System

    Gassho,
    Dosho

    Sat today
    Thanks Dosho

    Thing is. I have been here 2 years and just learned of it today.

    Gassho
    Ishin

    Sat Today

  28. #28
    Treeleaf Priest / Engineer Sekishi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Location
    Virginia, USA
    Thank you all for bumping this discussion. I did not know of this either.

    Gassho,
    Sekishi
    #sattoday
    Sekishi | 石志 | He/him | Better with a grain of salt, but best ignored entirely.

  29. #29
    Hi All,

    I found the old thread a few months ago, and gave Jundo’s contact info to my sweetie, in case something should happen to me. I put it in an email so he could find it easily. Also added Jundo to my “contact in case of my death” list in my file that has all my important papers. Recent events do point up a need to have contact info for those who wish it.

    Gassho
    Lisa
    sat today

  30. #30
    I will be letting my fiancé know to check in, should something happen.

    Gassho

    Sat today
    求道芸化 Kyūdō Geika
    I am just a priest-in-training, please do not take anything I say as a teaching.

  31. #31
    Kyotai
    Guest
    Good idea on this everyone. I think my wife would know to reach out. Some of us are connected on social network sites like fbook and it would be easier to receive word of a members sudden life event. But for the rest (I'm not on Facebook), not so easy. The thought had crossed my mind of having new members list emergency contacts in case of emergencies (optional perhaps)

    Gassho, Kyotai
    Sat today

  32. #32
    Quote Originally Posted by Kyotai View Post
    Good idea on this everyone. I think my wife would know to reach out. Some of us are connected on social network sites like fbook and it would be easier to receive word of a members sudden life event. But for the rest (I'm not on Facebook), not so easy. The thought had crossed my mind of having new members list emergency contacts in case of emergencies (optional perhaps)

    Gassho, Kyotai
    Sat today
    I agree that entrusting someone with emergency contact info sounds like a good idea. But not listing that publicly. I think we should wait to see what Jundo has in mind at this juncture.

    Gassho
    Ishin

    Sat Today

  33. #33
    Kyotai
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Ishin View Post
    I agree that entrusting someone with emergency contact info sounds like a good idea. But not listing that publicly. I think we should wait to see what Jundo has in mind at this juncture.

    Gassho
    Ishin

    Sat Today
    Certainly. Information to be exchanged between Jundo and a member privately. It was just a thought.

    Gassho, Kyotai
    Sat today

  34. #34
    I might add that if I'm correct this forum software also has an option to alert someone when a member hasn't logged in for x time. Though that might not be as effective as a buddy system

    A great idea.

    Gassho
    Ongen / Vincent
    Ongen (音源) - Sound Source

  35. #35
    Hi Vincent,

    I may let you mention it when we get the new system going, but we may try something simpler first. You can certainly introduce it though once the thread gets going.

    Gassho, J
    ALL OF LIFE IS OUR TEMPLE

  36. #36
    Ishin,

    It has been a sticky thread for quite some time and new ones are rarely added without some discussion. We can't make you read them; there is only so much we can do!

    Gassho,
    Dosho

    Sat today

    Quote Originally Posted by Ishin View Post
    Thanks Dosho

    Thing is. I have been here 2 years and just learned of it today.

    Gassho
    Ishin

    Sat Today

  37. #37
    Treeleaf Priest / Engineer Sekishi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Location
    Virginia, USA
    Quote Originally Posted by Dosho View Post
    It has been a sticky thread for quite some time and new ones are rarely added without some discussion. We can't make you read them; there is only so much we can do!
    It is like you are selling water by the riverside, and some of us are asking where we can buy water. Sorry for being dense.

    Gassho,
    Sekishi
    #sattoday
    Sekishi | 石志 | He/him | Better with a grain of salt, but best ignored entirely.

  38. #38
    That is true. Like a big monastery with lots of building with lots of rooms ... probably good to walk all around, poke around and have a look in all the dusty corners sometimes. Lots of things to discover!

    Gassho, Jundo

    SatToday
    ALL OF LIFE IS OUR TEMPLE

  39. #39
    My family knows all about this Sangha. They see me sitting live-online most mornings and Zazenkai on Friday evenings. It is part of their lives too. If I got run over by car or something Treeleaf would be contacted along with other friends and family. The Sangha contact info is on the phone message board.

    Gassho
    Daizan

    sattoday

  40. #40
    Mp
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Daizan View Post
    My family knows all about this Sangha. They see me sitting live-online most mornings and Zazenkai on Friday evenings. It is part of their lives too. If I got run over by car or something Treeleaf would be contacted along with other friends and family. The Sangha contact info is on the phone message board.

    Gassho
    Daizan

    sattoday
    The same is here too and have someone who would notify Treeleaf if I was unable to.

    Gassho
    Shingen

    SatToday

  41. #41
    Joyo
    Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by Shingen View Post
    The same is here too and have someone who would notify Treeleaf if I was unable to.

    Gassho
    Shingen

    SatToday
    I also have someone.

    Gassho,
    Joyo
    sat today

  42. #42
    Greetings all.
    I think this is a wonderful idea.
    I would ask my wife, and my daughter to be my points of contact.
    Just let me know where to submit the information.

    Gassho,
    Theophan
    Sat Today

    P.S. Thank You for the birthday e-mail

  43. #43
    Thank you for refreshing this post.

    Gassho,

    Kyonin
    #SatToday
    Hondō Kyōnin
    奔道 協忍

  44. #44
    I'm impressed. I've encountered this thread a while ago. As I was in a situation depending on others almost a year ago, I've procratinated a "do in case of my death" (or similar conditions) file since then, having experienced my family did do the right things. But though they know about you, I think they do not understand the meaning for me.
    Thanks for getting me organize a bit.

    Gassho,
    Danny
    #sattoday

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