Push/pull a thought during zazen

[Kaitan]

Good morning everyone,

Just want to share some experience. Last night's sit I noticed a disturbing thought and the action of pushing it away or maybe "the disturbed person" was another thought I could be aware of: as if it was a harsh movement that the moment it arises it goes away. It was like watching a show and a guy got annoyed by something and disappeared, a hoax basically.
So the teachings normally point that we are not our thoughts, and this "experience" was particularly interesting because I think I could witness something that I always thought it was "me".

Gasshō

ST

Bernal

[Jundo]

Good morning everyone,

Just want to share some experience. Last night's sit I noticed a disturbing thought and the action of pushing it away or maybe "the disturbed person" was another thought I could be aware of: as if it was a harsh movement that the moment it arises it goes away. It was like watching a show and a guy got annoyed by something and disappeared, a hoax basically.
So the teachings normally point that we are not our thoughts, and this "experience" was particularly interesting because I think I could witness something that I always thought it was "me".

Gasshō

ST

Bernal

When a disturbing thought comes, neither seek to push it away, nor grab it and wallow in it. Just let it be.

Also, "disturbing" is your judgement and reaction between your ears. Sit with radical equanimity (even equanimity about the feeling of "feeling disturbed"), and then all is just a "situation," not a "disturbance."

Drop aside all thoughts of the "situation/disturbance" too out side you, and your "me, the disturbed person" who stands apart looking out at the outside. Leave it all alone.

Then the hard borders of your "me/not me outside" will also soften or fully drop away. In the wholeness which results, there cannot be even a separate "situation."



Gassho, J

stlah

[Kaitan]

ST

Bernal

[Seiko]

To embody Kanzeon we try to be kind to ourselves as well as others.

Gasshō
Seiko
stlah

[strangestchange]

Hi Bernal,
I relate to this -- I've stayed with meditation because it's the only process that's shown me how my mind does its own thing (cooking up predictions, making scenarios, adding possible facts, etc...) regardless of what I do. Just witnessing that the mind has its own behaviour was profound for me, and a relief. Now I can watch the wheels spin and be okay (most of the time!). Thanks for sharing your experience.
SC
sat today

[Kaitan]

Hi Bernal,
I relate to this -- I've stayed with meditation because it's the only process that's shown me how my mind does its own thing (cooking up predictions, making scenarios, adding possible facts, etc...) regardless of what I do. Just witnessing that the mind has its own behaviour was profound for me, and a relief. Now I can watch the wheels spin and be okay (most of the time!). Thanks for sharing your experience.
SC
sat today

Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this too! I appreciate it




ST

Bernal

[Kaitan]

To embody Kanzeon we try to be kind to ourselves as well as others.

Gasshō
Seiko
stlah

Thanks for the reminder, Seiko



ST

Bernal