I appreciate all the comments. In the helping professions (bodhisattva ideal) we teach that you need boundaries in order to remain healthy, that a lack of boundaries leads to suffering. But in Buddhism we teach there are no boundaries, that it is the boundaries we create which lead to our suffering. Dilemma? Or just two sides of the same coin?
I think it is the perspective from which you are viewing the question. For most people who aren't buddhists, when they think of helping others, it seems to me as though they think in terms of personal sacrifice only. Like, the more I give up for others, the more helpful I am being. But what if they give up so much that they not only don't have any more to give, but are now in need of help themselves? That could be money help, or counseling help from the stress, or relationship help because they spend all their time helping others but not spending time with their loved ones,etc. In Buddhism, I think that we look at this as helping everyone including myself because we are all one. Since there is no separation between us, helping others would necessarily include me as well, thereby enabling me to continue to help others.
The reminder to have boundries, I feel, is there because elsewise some people would forget themselves in order to do what they thought was a good deed. In Buddhism, I feel that we understand that we and they are one, so we could not forget ourselves as long as we remain mindful of that fact.
IMHO