Hello everyone,

I first want to apologize for not writing for some time, but I've had some difficulty in my life recently. I seem to have a problem letting go of my judging ways. I haven't been able to release my ego and I find myself being the same old opinionated self (no self). I cannot seem to "let go" of these feelings and thoughts of comparing myself to others; instead of focusing on the good things that others offer. I seem to judge them by thinking that they are not following a life that I believe is the "right" way to act towards our fellow sentient beings. Moreover, this is not a productive way to live, so why am I viewing faults in others, when I should be looking at my own thoughts and actions? Now, I know that I shouldn't worry about how others live and I should live a life filled with compassion for all things, but these thoughts just jump into my head before I can stop them. I've been having a really hard time with this lately. It seems to be running my life right now, and I just want it to stop. I've never have had "holier than thou" feelings before, and I'm not sure that I'm experiencing that now, but I do feel like I'm losing the path a little bit. In addition, my zazen is suffering because of these negative thoughts. When I sit (few and far between lately) I cannot seem to just slow down and just BE. I would appreciate any advice or maybe some reassuring words that will help me better understand what I'm experiencing. Thank you.

Gassho,

Adam