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Thread: Letting people speak for themselves

  1. #1

    Letting people speak for themselves

    Hi. This is not specifically related to the post on silence.

    Perhaps my understanding is limited, but doesn't it seem presumptous to speak for other people in stead of letting them speak for themself. We all walk the path. We all cause trouble sometimes, and we all act according to how we are at that moment according to the limitations of our undertsanding.

    I've read things such as: All of us are going to do this or that. We are all with you. Now, whether that is true or not, doesn't it make more sense to let others speak for themselves instead of taking it on your shoulders to speak for them?

    Kodo Sawaki
    When adults are only adults, children don’t grow up. When children cry, you’ve got to cry with them. Adults have to be children, children have to be adults. Between buddhas and ordinary people, the buddha-dharma and the social world, satori and illusion, ascending and descending, wisdom and compassion – there’s got to be a lively exchange among all of these.
    Is it right to interfer with the choices that someone makes? Is it our place to do so? If we can't treat people as adults then how do we expect them to become adults? Adults make bad choices, as well as correct ones. Shall we not explain? Offer advice? Encourage? Instead of: cutting off, assuming, bullying, expecting, and presuming? I mean. Who do you think you are anyway? Doesn't every Buddha have the right to discover things and speak for themself?

    I am reluctant to speak for anyone, as only they can speak for themself. What will anyone learn if words are put in their mouth, and action taken for them without consent?

    Gassho

  2. #2
    Senior Member AlanLa's Avatar
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    Re: Letting people speak for themselves

    Speaking just for myself, I often use the word "we" just as an expression. It is an assumption, true, but it is assumed to be a fairly safe assumption that certainly intends no harm and forgives any mild inaccuracies. But "we" is also said without mindfulness when just an expression. So, speaking mindfully, I should say I when I mean I and we when I truly mean we.

    A good lesson, but also difficult, as it is hard to be so mindful of words flowing out of my (our?) mouth like water over the falls.

    And now, please speak for yourselves...

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