Not the perfect Parent
I am a full time social worker which also requires me to be oncall, and am I still finishing college. By the time I get home I usually barely have enough energy to follow the routine with my daughter: practice a subject (the alphabet, or reading, counting, etc.) play for 5 minutes or less (and this is where my problem is) and then a bath and some evening meditation for 2-3 minutes where she has a different role every night (ie: ring the bell, recite the Heart Sutra, blow out the candles, etc..) and then our nightly reading and bedtime.
The problem for me is the play time. She is 3 years old, and I am finding it increasingly more difficult to find the patience to play with her (this sounds horrible, I know!) but when I start playing with her, I feel like I should be doing something else like homework, house cleaning, etc. My wife is a stay at home Mom and needs the time I give her when I do my parenting share, but as time goes on for me I can't help feeling trapped by playtime.
The weekends are even worse. I feel like I am constantly coming up with excuses not to play tea party or legos, or whatever, but even though I am aware of it - I can't seem to be like I was a few months ago- excited to come home and play with my daughter.
My daughter is exceptionally patient with me and often reminds me "well, thats okay - we can play later." and then I feel REALLY guilty.
How can get over this mental block? Has anyone else had periods like this?