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Thread: Death, Grieving and Buddhism

  1. #1

    Death, Grieving and Buddhism

    I lost my grandmother on Wednesday. It's been a difficult time for me and my family. I'm alright but obviously grieving as is normal and healthy.

    We had a Roman Catholic service for her according to her wishes. I understand the comforting appeal to the Christian belief that we will be reunited with our loves ones at death. But, I don't accept it as something I believe. However, this makes me sad too. I understand that the very nature of life is that we become separated from all that we cherish and every one that we love.

    It's such a bittersweet reality, a difficult thing but it gives such value and meaning to the present moment and the relationships we have.

  2. #2
    Dear Gregor,

    Please accept my condolences at your family's loss.

    gassho,
    Louis

  3. #3

    I, too am sorry for your loss

    But perhaps, if we do not have a separate self, we have not really lost our loved ones?

    Gassho,

    Linda

  4. #4
    Hary, Lious, Linda -

    Thank you for your sentiments.

    Linda,

    You may have a point, I do feel like my grandmother lives on in my heart.

  5. #5
    Hi Gregor,

    My thoughts are with you and your family. Yes, grieving is natural to human beings and not something to run from.

    I lost my mom a year and some ago. I still see her whenever I look at the grass, trees or clouds, as much as if looking into her eyes. I even see her in Gregor and his Grandmother.I like to think that I may meet her again, but I surely meet her now.

    Gassho, Jundo

  6. #6

  7. #7
    There are times when sorry seems to be the only truth -- Oscar Wilde

    My thoughts are with you.

    Gassho, Janice

  8. #8
    Sorry to hear that man.

    No good at these sorts of words I'm afraid, they always come out sounding heartless.

    A moment of silence...

  9. #9
    Dear Greg,

    My heartfelt condolences...

    Gassho
    Ken

  10. #10
    Treeleaf Unsui Shohei's Avatar
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    Deepest condolences to you Greg and your family. My best thoughts are with you.

    Gassho
    Dirk

  11. #11
    My condolences as well Greg.

    Best wishes and Gassho,
    Kelly

  12. #12

  13. #13
    My heart is with you Greg.

    My grandfather passed away a bit over a year ago, he was the first close relative to die for me. I did not grieve so much, but felt a kind of emptiness inside for awhile after (perhaps some remorse as well, because he was not always the easiest person to be around and I occasionally thought it would be easier if he "wouldn't be around anymore"). I think it also helped that he did not pass away suddenly, but lingered on a few weeks in hospital after a stroke so we got to say goodbye to him and prepare in advance for the inevitable.

    Gassho and take care,
    Mika

  14. #14
    Thank you everyone, I'm touched by and deeply appreciate your kind words and show of support.

  15. #15
    Sorry for your loss, Greg.

    Gassho,
    Bill

  16. #16
    My condolences for you and your family Gregor. I wish you some happy memories and to carry you through this time.

    Steve

  17. #17
    I'm very sorry to hear of your loss, Greg.

    I often find myself quite jealous of Christians who have such a strong faith that they will be re-united with their dead loved ones. I wish I could believe in that, it seems a comforting thought.

    My thoughts are with you and your family in this sad time.

    -paige

  18. #18
    Hi Greg,

    My thoughts are with you and your family as well. May the memories of her help you all during this time.

    While I'm sure you know this, remember to feel what you feel. No problem.

    With Metta,
    Keith

  19. #19
    Hey Greg!

    My heartfelt condolences, both my grandparents on my mother's side died a few months apart from one another in 2006, with my father-in-law dying shortly after. Everytime I peel a tangerine, every time I open a fridge....taking into account that they're dead, I sometimes think that their voices couldn't be very much louder inside my mind even if indeed they were still alive.

    Unborn, undying.....ya know. Sometimes a hug is worth more then a hundred stupid pretentious Koans.

    Gassho hug,

    Hans

  20. #20
    Senior Member Martin's Avatar
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    Gregor

    A sad time. Be kind to yourself.

    Gassho

    Martin

  21. #21
    Thank you Martin,

    I'm doing my best. Crying some tears now and then, but they are good tears.

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