Today during Zazenkai a major cloud drifted into view.
I found myself drifting off onto a tangent about religion. The frustration of my sister's fundamentalism. The past ghosts of growing up in my parent's church. Their country club attitude towards Christianity. My wife's clinging to the idea that some how some way, her cherry picking Catholicism will match what the priests are actually advocating. The list goes on, you get the idea. Then.. "oh thinking" Drop it. Back to the blue sky. As I did I felt a physical shaking in my body as a whole bunch of resentment, judgment, resistance and other things I have no name for, that I have been clinging to on these topics, just also drifted right out of me.
After sitting it came to me. There is nothing to do with all this. It has no meaning other than what I give it. There is nothing to fight. Just be myself, do my thing. I don't have to have an opinion on these things. I don't have to do anything about these things. Just be
The clear blue sky is a little clearer tonight or is it" just me".