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Thread: Announcement from Jundo: NO MORE ZAZEN at TREELEAF! I'm Sick of It!

  1. #1

    Announcement from Jundo: NO MORE ZAZEN at TREELEAF! I'm Sick of It!

    I QUIT!

    I have a confession to make, and have already spoken to Taigu about it, he agrees. Time to face the facts ... and the fat. We both CAN'T TAKE ANOTHER MINUTE OF ZAZEN! Where do I get all the hours back I spent staring at dust balls roll across the floor?

    Sorry, but we are OFFICIALLY ENDING ZAZEN SITTING at Treeleaf!

    Anybody want to buy 20 used Zafus? Enough is Enough! All meditating has made me is a nervous wreck!

    Last edited by Jundo; 04-01-2013 at 02:14 PM.
    ALL OF LIFE IS OUR TEMPLE

    #SAT TODAY!

  2. #2
    I agree ... Who thought of this sitting thing anyway.
    RINDO SHINGEN
    倫道 真現

    As a trainee priest, please take any commentary by me on matters of the Dharma with a pinch of salt.

  3. #3
    Well trying to reply also seeems to be fitting into the day. You do this to us every year and yet we still fall for it, at least for a few seconds.... Happy April 1 to you, Taigu and Treeleaf

    Jim

  4. #4
    Jeeze,
    Only saw this now. What a relief. My ass was getting sore.
    Gassho
    Myozan

  5. #5
    Jundo, you really should do comedy!

    Happy April fools day!

    Gassho
    Matt

  6. #6
    Treeleaf Unsui Yugen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Midcoast Maine
    Blog Entries
    2
    So what do I do now? Now that I've told everyone here I'm leaving home, I guess I'll just keep camping in the back of my car....

    Happy April 1!

    Deep bows
    Yugen
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    Please take all my comments with a grain of salt - I am a novice priest and anything I say is to be taken with a good dose of skepticism - Shodo Yugen

  7. #7
    Well, you got me for a whole minute there! Whattha.........
    Jugling the zafu to rumba music is a stroke of genius

    Gassho

    Enkyo

  8. #8
    Oh, thank God. I was wondering when you would--oh. Ohhhhhhh.

    Never mind.

    10-4

    Jen

  9. #9
    Guess it's back to surfing TV with my bong.



    Gassho
    Daizan
    美道 代山 Bido Daizan

    As a trainee priest, please take any commentary by me on matters of the Dharma with a pinch of salt.

  10. #10
    Rofl rofl rofl!!!!!
    Heisoku
    平 息

  11. #11
    Member Geika's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    San Diego County, California
    Only got me for a second, because I was up a bit too early this morning...
    迎 Geika

  12. #12
    Don't bother with the games room - you already have one!

    When I showed my hubby a still of the the zendo he took one look at the zafu bench in the middle and asked (in all seriousness)
    'Is that a pool table?'

    Happy April 1st - that's the most amusing stunt yet Jundo


    Gassho

    Willow

  13. #13
    Treeleaf Engineer Seimyo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Yuba City, California, USA
    Nice one Jundo. If I hadn't already been gagged twice this morning you might have led me a little longer.

    Gassho.
    Seimyo

    明 Seimyō (Christhatischris)

  14. #14
    What am I going to do with my Friday nights?

  15. #15
    Two things:

    1) "The Five Second Sit" is already trademarked. It is going to be a free dvd included with six minutes abs.

    2) Are there any zafus left? I'm going to need a couple more to do zazumba.
    Try not to be a jerk-- one of the Buddhas

  16. #16
    Jundo,

    Ha! You didn't get me to fall for it this time! Only took me 5 years.

    Gassho,
    Dosho

  17. #17
    Hi.

    I'm all for zazumba!

    mtfbwy
    Fugen
    Life is our temple and its all good practice
    Blog: http://fugenblog.blogspot.com/

  18. #18
    Made me smile for seven minutes. I like the hat, too.
    Shōmon

  19. #19

    So, what will we do now?
    Thirty minute standing sessions?


    Gassho,
    Heishu

  20. #20
    What on earth am I doing sitting and running.

    Zazumba is where it's at!!

    This made me laugh like mad

    Thank you Jundo!

    Gassho,

    Kyonin
    Please remember I am only a priest in training. I could be wrong in everything I say. Slap me if needed.

    The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one. Mr. Spock

  21. #21
    Awesome
    You sound just like my selfish self before sitting...

    also:
    ... we were half drunk

    - LOL'd!

    Gassho
    Shohei

  22. #22
    Best April fools joke I've seen in a long time. Being new to the group, I went from thinking "this is a funny joke", to "has this guy really cracked". My wife and I laughed through the entire thing. Thanks Jundo. I don't think we can ever laugh enough.

  23. #23
    "we were in a bar at the time...half drunk" haha! Sadly this sounds a lot like the rationalizations I try and make when I don't feel like sitting, "watching CSI counts right?"

    Gassho to the Cow and the Hippo
    Gassho, Kaishin
    Thanks,
    Kaishin (Open Heart aka Matt)
    Please take this layman's words with a grain of salt.

  24. #24
    Treeleaf Unsui Shugen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Cincinnati Ohio Area (Northern Kentucky)
    "Fudgin' Zazen...."


    Shugen
    As a priest in training, please take everything I say with a pinch of salt

    Meido Shugen
    明道 修眼

  25. #25
    I thought everyone already used earphones anyway? ;-)

    The Zazumba really could fly, though!


    Nice one, Jundo.


    Andy

  26. #26
    Treeleaf Unsui Shokai's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Sarnia, Ontario Canada
    Blog Entries
    230
    OK, I've been doing this for fifteen + years, does that mean I do another fifteen before I can dance with the tucows >? ( btw, is it zazumba or zazemba; my spell checker is having a meltdown.)
    Yesterday was another opening day and I am so glad you're giving up listening to baseball during zazen since it looks like the Yankees are in for a bad year already.
    Thank you my friend, may all your sits be good ones,
    仁道 生開 - Jindo Shokai "Open to life in a benevolent way"
    Remember; sages love mountains and mountains love sages.

  27. #27
    Hahahahahaha thank you!

    Gassho

    Risho

  28. #28
    Ohhh Jundo,

    You got me for the second year

    Before seeing the video I thought and reading the big post "oh no"
    Really good actor

    Gassho

    Myoshin
    Myoshin 妙 心
    "A person who receives the Buddhist Precepts enters the state of Buddha at once. They stand at the same level as Gautama Buddha. We can say they are a child of the Buddha." Jundo

  29. #29
    Member Geika's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    San Diego County, California
    Though the video is primarily a joke, I enjoy how you conjured meaning out of it, Jundo.

    Gassho
    迎 Geika

  30. #30
    OKOKOK imagine, i got it on Feb 2nd...really not ready for it....
    "Know that the practice of zazen is the complete path of buddha-dharma and nothing can be compared to it....it is not the practice of one or two buddhas but all the buddha ancestors practice this way."
    Dogen zenji in Bendowa






  31. #31
    Quote Originally Posted by Yugen View Post
    So what do I do now? Now that I've told everyone here I'm leaving home, I guess I'll just keep camping in the back of my car....

    Happy April 1!

    Deep bows
    Yugen
    LOL!

    Oh I am sooo glad, I don't need to be self-conscious about watching Friends on DVD anymore!!!!
    The best way to honour the women of the Prairies who won the right to vote a hundred years ago isn't a monument. It's you going out to vote.

  32. #32
    Haha, awesome, Jundo!
    Zazumba - why didn't I have that idea? Perhaps I can come up with some cool bowing moves and sell a DVD (will post Amazon link when it's available). Working title "The 5 Minute Zazumba Vol. I" ...
    no thing needs to be added

  33. #33
    "Build yourself up forthat ultimate challenge! The revolution in personal fitness training has finallycome. Tired of sitting without a goal and putting on those pounds in shikantaza?The proven Zazen zumba 1000 full prostrations exercise will change it all! Inonly 50 eons of easy to follow steps, you will be able to do it like theprofessionals! Get the DVD now and start changing your life! But wait! If youorder NOW, you will get the CD with Jundo Sama tophits like “Do the Dogen”, the always inspiring “They are both true!” and off coursethat Harlem shake classic Zazenkai!!!! For FREE! Get ready toparty and impress all your friends at the barbeque with the Diamond Sutra inJapanese!!! Get it now!!! Only available at Treeleaf stores near you!!!!!!!!!
    Please note:
    This product is non refundable and founders or/and other associates are not liable for any damages or changes done to house interiors.
    Treeleaf DOES take full responsibility for any unexpected positive changes in lifeand or relationships but does not NOT take any responsibility for any physical discomfort,lost time and/or confusion.
    This product only produces the results when done in combination with ahealthy lifestyle and responsible self conduct. Do not put this product in any microwave. This product is not suited for human consumption although frustration may lead to attempts to it.

  34. #34

  35. #35
    Personal favorite: showing chest muscle exercise while yelling, "WORK THOSE ABS!
    Gassho,
    Edward
    Last edited by Myosha; 04-03-2013 at 11:07 PM. Reason: good manners

  36. #36
    Hahaha, good one, Jundo! You had me rolling on the floor the whole time... really needed that laugh!

    (Shohei, just the thought of Jundo and Taigu at a bar cracked me up so much, I almost missed the "half drunk" comment!)

    Gassho,

    Lisa

  37. #37
    I saw this just now on April 5th. It never struck to me till you said Happy April Fool's Day! Not even when you said today is April 1st.

    These were my thoughts:

    - This Jundo guy is crazy
    - He is really closing this and I trusted him and came here
    - What happened to Taigu; I thought atleast he is sane
    - Did these guys get some kind of enlightenment and moved to the kind of teachings that non-duality teachers teach (Do nothing, you are already enlightened etc)
    - May be Zazen is really waste of time. Nothing is happening for me too

    hahaha. roflmao!

  38. #38
    Or instead of sitting around the clock for ten days we could all give up Zazen and parrtaaayyy

    Gassho
    Jakuden
    SatToday
    serene
    ​field

  39. #39
    Man and I just shaved my head too

    Gassho
    Ishin
    Sat Today

  40. #40
    Oh, are those T-shirts for sale too?

    You know, getting bored of sewn rags, fashion has to start somewhere...

    Gassho
    Jika
    #satonscheduletoday
    治 Ji
    花 Ka

  41. #41
    This is all too funny! I have laughed my way through all the posts!

    Gassho, Grace.
    Almost sat today -- was going to plus 10 more until Jundo told me not to!
    Sat today and 10 more in honor of Treeleaf's 10th Anniversary!

  42. #42
    Cool.. Pondering to acquire the zafu juggler skills

    Gassho,
    Washin
    just zazenathoned

  43. #43
    Quote Originally Posted by Jakuden View Post
    Or instead of sitting around the clock for ten days we could all give up Zazen and parrtaaayyy

    Gassho
    Jakuden
    SatToday


    So funny, Jakuden!

    Gassho, Grace.
    Sat today and 10 more in honor of Treeleaf's 10th Anniversary!

  44. #44


    'Half drunk', 'zazumba', 'working abs with the chest exercise'. Loved it.

    Gassho
    Karen
    Just about to sit for zazemathon but going to watch CSI instead!

  45. #45
    Quote Originally Posted by Daizan View Post
    Guess it's back to surfing TV with my bong.



    Gassho
    Daizan
    hahhahhhahahhahahaahahahaahhahhhahah Yeah - I've converted to Big Lebowski Buddhism too.

    I've also found the cure to suffering (not getting what I want); it's to buy what I want when I want it. Duh! It's not rocket science!

    Gassho,

    Risho
    -sattoday

  46. #46
    Well, I am glad this was reposted, because I did not get to the annual April Fool this year ...

    I was planning to announce my run for President of the USA !! The Dharma Donald!



    However, well, it will have to wait 4 years!

    My platform? As a Zen guy, I am both "for" and "against" everything, at the same time!

    My plan for solving the Middle East situation? Getting everybody to "just stop"!

    My immigration plan? Eliminate all borders ... of the MIND!

    My run was guaranteed to get big "Tea Party" support.

    I am against war with Canada!

    Our court system should be replaced with meditation!

    The defense department should be replaced with meditation!

    In fact, everything should be meditation!

    My tax policy? The Sound of One Hand Clapping!

    Buddha on the dollar bill! Buddha Bucks!

    Change the national anthem to the Heart Sutra!

    ... never got much further though. Given the jokes, probably good that it didn't.

    Gassho, J

    SatToday
    Attached Images Attached Images
    Last edited by Jundo; 04-01-2016 at 02:00 PM.
    ALL OF LIFE IS OUR TEMPLE

    #SAT TODAY!

  47. #47
    Quote Originally Posted by Risho View Post
    Yeah - I've converted to Big Lebowski Buddhism too.
    We have a gathering of folks that do Zazen in my basement once per week and a new guy showed up one time and we did some zazen and then hung out with the other regulars. I never really pay attention to what goes on outside my little world. Several months later I watched the Big Levowski and recognized one of the actors from somewhere. I then connected the dots. He was the dude that had been in my basement! Ever since I been a fan of the movie the Big Lebowski.

    Gassho, Jishin, ST
    "The Great Way is not difficult. It only excludes picking and choosing. Once you stop loving and hating, It will enlighten itself." - Xin Xin Ming

  48. #48
    Wow cool Jishin!

    Jundo you have my vote!!!!

    Gassho,
    Jakuden
    SatToday


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    serene
    ​field

  49. #49
    Quote Originally Posted by Jakuden View Post
    Wow cool Jishin!
    Well, it wasn't the dude dude but it was Smokey, the character that was bowling with him when John Goodman went a little cray cray. He is a Tibetan practitioner and his wife has dharma transmission. He is a cool dude. .

    Gasho, Jishin, _/st\_
    "The Great Way is not difficult. It only excludes picking and choosing. Once you stop loving and hating, It will enlighten itself." - Xin Xin Ming

  50. #50
    "Butt" (HaHaHa) I was just getting started....

    Gassho, BillH
    SatToday

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