The element of practice that I find most challenging is in relaxing my desire to "attain" in my daily Dharma walk. I struggle to relax my "grip" on the goalless goal. Sometimes I feel as though I have found my middle way, but then I will panic and frantically clutch for something to make my practice more tangible. Like a person constantly wondering if the medicine they took is working.
How can I avoid the pitfalls of apathy and nihilism as I continue to internalize that there is nothing that needs to be done but to sit?